I live in one of the better sections of Greater Pittsburgh. It's so good that even the roaches left of their own accord, years ago. I get to see the pretty flashing lights of the squad cars on a regular basis, and I am lulled to sleep by the lilting strains of rap and semi-automatic weapons' fire. Not bad for an area that was once important enough to have had several squadrons of Soviet ICBMs pointed at it...

So... What happened? How did it happen? Is there any hope for the future? I will try to look these questions squarely in the eye, and will, with any luck, piss off every Yinzer within 50 miles.